Match Day
Intelligence.

Every match. Every score. Every Excuse...

Recent Fixtures

L — F*** Sake. - Matchday 17: June 07, 2026

A2B FC 1 — 3 AC Me Rollin

The Verdict: The sun was obviously in the ref's eyes, as at this point we are almost certain that even David Blunket (Look him up if you need to...) would have been able to spot more infringments than him...

D — Unbeaten Run CONTINUES! - Matchday 16: May 31, 2026

A2B FC 4 — 4 FC Savvas

The Verdict: We held the league leaders to a stalemate! An incredibly clinical display from Jamie upfront paired with a 'bodies on the line' defensive shift. They might be top, but they couldn't break our spirit!

W — Goodbye Zinger's - Matchday 15: May 24, 2026

A2B FC 5 — 0 Stretham FC

The Verdict: Inter Zingers don't show up. Team given automatic 5-0 win but won 7-2 on the night against a stand in team.

W — It happened again?! - Matchday 14: May 17, 2026

A2B FC 6 — 2 Mateta's Eagles

The Verdict: Wait, what?! We won again? We can do that?! Who knew!!!

D — Valuable points! - Matchday 13: May 10, 2026

A2B FC 4 — 4 Juffa Cakes

The Verdict: Incredible performance from our lads against a very good side! We happily take a draw.

L — Most hated team in the league...? - Matchday 12: May 03, 2026

A2B FC 2 — 3 AC Me Rollin

The Verdict: Well we didn't end up in a fight with AC Me Rollin like they did against their oppnents last week! We take the little wins!

L — What could have been... - Matchday 11: April 26, 2026

A2B FC 3 — 5 FC Savvas

The Verdict: What if Myler wasn't on holiday? What if the two deflections had gone wide? What if Philinho had taken one step to the left? We will never know.

L — Traumatic - Matchday 9: April 12, 2026

A2B FC 0 — 6 Mateta's Eagles

The Verdict: A rare day of zero excuses. We were played off the park.

W — THE HISTORIC WIN - Matchday 8: March 29, 2026

A2B FC 4 — 3 AC Me Rollin

The Verdict: The streak is over. Jaime 'Showtime' Pither dismantled one of the league's most elite defense with a sublime hat-trick, while the opposition's salt levels reached an all-time high. No handshakes, no problem.
Three points in the bag.

L — The War of Attrition - Matchday 7: March 22, 2026

A2B FC 2 — 9 FC Savvas

The Verdict: Facing this lot when they play like they're in an underground fight club is no easy feat... A majestic goal from Showtime &Philinho was the highlight; the lowlight was the medical bill.

L — The Empty Bench - Matchday 6: March 15, 2026

A2B FC 0 — 5 Inter Zingers

The Verdict: Playing the league leaders with no subs is like playing Fifa with a broken controller. We held them off for as long as humanly possible before the lack of oxygen kicked in.

L — Matchday 5: Mar 08, 2026

A2B FC 1 — 4 Mateta's Eagles

The Verdict: 4-1 doesn't tell the real story. The return of Ted Lawrence brought the spark, but the opposition goalkeeper brought a level of agility that suggests he might be part feline. A2B played well. Enough said.

L — The Philinho Debut - Matchday 4: Mar 01, 2026

A2B FC 2 — 6 Juffa Cakes FC

The Verdict: Philinho’s tactical gamble failed to pay off, unless the goal was to make the previous Gaffa look like Pep Guardiola.

L — Matchday 3: Feb 22, 2026

A2B FC 1 — 3 AC Me Rollin

The Verdict: An extrenemy physical match.
Opposition aided by a referee who we can only assume was refereeing via FaceTime on a 3G connection.

L — Matchday 2: Feb 15, 2026

A2B FC 2 — 5 FC Savva

The Verdict:The ref didn't allow us enough time to mount our comeback...

L — Matchday 1: Feb 08, 2026

A2B FC 0 — 6 Inter Zingers

The Verdict: Ref was clearly their captain's dad. Investigation pending.

Season Performance

Averaging 1.5 excuses per game and 0.5 points. The board remains "confident" (delusional).